Chapter 20: My Beloved Dream - The Bridegroom, 2/7/2022

February 7th, 2022 Dream - The Bridegroom

Last night I dreamt that my late husband, Jack, appeared in my dream [he always represents the Lord, as my beloved] and he was sitting at his work desk and had made up his mind to divorce me. He held up two fingers pinched together to represent how close he was to getting a divorce from me. I was very upset and shocked as if I had not seen that coming and it seemed he was at peace with his decision, but I was not. I watched him sitting there smiling, happy and content as if he had moved on! I decided I would fight for this beloved husband, and was contemplating how handsome he really was, and his personality, how desirable he was, and how had I left this "first love" of mine? Where had I gotten off track in my love for him, my relationship as his wife? 

Then I saw an individual quietly and quickly bring in another female to meet him, and watching, I knew she was brought to him as my replacement. She was absolutely beautiful, stunning and appeared to be at the top of the list of sought after models available. I knew as I looked upon her beauty I could never compete with such beauty and perfection, as she seemed to have it all! But as I watched my beloved, he was not taken by her deceitful charm and vainful beauty, as he was not even the slightest bit interested in her.  As I pondered this, I made up my mind I was going to do whatever it took to get my beloved back again, but how could I ever measure up to this beauty? How could I ever compete with her?  She seemed so confident in her outward beauty, so I felt totally defeated, but the voice of the Holy Spirit spoke to me: You are fixated on her outward appearance but I'm looking on her inside and she is vile and full of corruption on the inside... you need to work on the inside, become the Proverbs woman I have designed you to be as written in my word, Proverbs 31.  Remember King David, I chose him for the inside beauty that I saw and not as mankind chooses.  I look upon the heart.

I decided to become more familiar with Proverbs 31 and asked God to transform me into this woman, to reunite me with this man, my beloved, my first love. Show me how to become the wife he needs me to be, transform me into this Proverbs woman that pleases you Lord, to become a bride without spot or wrinkle!

I feel, after talking to my daughter Christina this morning about this dream, as she prayed for God's interpretation for the body of Christ, she felt this does represent the bride of Christ and many of us without knowing it, have left our first love. Let us return while we have time to do so! In Jesus name.

SCRIPTURES:
Revelation 3:14 “And to the angel of the church of the Laodiceans write, ‘These things says the Amen, the Faithful and True Witness, the Beginning of the creation of God:15“I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot.16“So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth.17“Because you say, ‘I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing’—and do not know that you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked—18“I counsel you to buy from Me gold refined in the fire, that you may be rich; and white garments, that you may be clothed, that the shame of your nakedness may not be revealed; and anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see. 19“As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten. Therefore be zealous and repent. 20“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. 21“To him who overcomes I will grant to sit with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne. 22“He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.” 

Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.
29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church 30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 31“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
11The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
12She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
14She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
15She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
16She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
17She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
18She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
19She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
20She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
21She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
22She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
25Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
29“Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”

30 — Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

1 Samuel 16: 1Now the LORD said to Samuel, “How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill your horn with oil, and go; I am sending you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided Myself a king among his sons.” 2And Samuel said, “How can I go? If Saul hears it, he will kill me.” But the LORD said, “Take a heifer with you, and say, ‘I have come to sacrifice to the LORD.’ 3“Then invite Jesse to the sacrifice, and I will show you what you shall do; you shall anoint for Me the one I name to you.”
4So Samuel did what the LORD said, and went to Bethlehem. And the elders of the town trembled at his coming, and said, “Do you come peaceably?”
5And he said, “Peaceably; I have come to sacrifice to the LORD. Sanctify yourselves, and come with me to the sacrifice.” Then he consecrated Jesse and his sons, and invited them to the sacrifice. 6So it was, when they came, that he looked at Eliab and said, “Surely the LORD’s anointed is before Him!”
7But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the LORD does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”8So Jesse called Abinadab, and made him pass before Samuel. And he said, “Neither has the LORD chosen this one.” 9Then Jesse made Shammah pass by. And he said, “Neither has the LORD chosen this one.”
10Thus Jesse made seven of his sons pass before Samuel. And Samuel said to Jesse, “The LORD has not chosen these.” 11And Samuel said to Jesse, “Are all the young men here?” Then he said, “There remains yet the youngest, and there he is, keeping the sheep.” And Samuel said to Jesse, “Send and bring him. For we will not sit down till he comes here.” 12 So he sent and brought him in. Now he was ruddy, with bright eyes, and good-looking. And the LORD said, “Arise, anoint him; for this is the one!” 13Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers; and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that day forward. So Samuel arose and went to Ramah.

Revelation 2: 1“To the angel of the church of Ephesus write, ‘These things says He who holds the seven stars in His right hand, who walks in the midst of the seven golden lampstands: 2“I know your works, your labor, your patience, and that you cannot bear those who are evil. And you have tested those who say they are apostles and are not, and have found them liars; 3“and you have persevered and have patience, and have labored for My name’s sake and have not become weary. 4“Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. 5“Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent. 6“But this you have, that you hate the deeds of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate.

Revelation 2:18“And to the angel of the church in Thyatira write, ‘These things says the Son of God, who has eyes like a flame of fire, and His feet like fine brass: 19“I know your works, love, service, faith, and your patience; and as for your works, the last are more than the first. 20“Nevertheless I have a few things against you, because you allow that woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophetess, to teach and seduce My servants to commit sexual immorality and eat things sacrificed to idols.21“And I gave her time to repent of her sexual immorality, and she did not repent. 22“Indeed I will cast her into a sickbed, and those who commit adultery with her into great tribulation, unless they repent of their deeds. 23“I will kill her children with death, and all the churches shall know that I am He who searches the minds and hearts. And I will give to each one of you according to your works.

Revelation 17: 1 Then one of the seven angels who had the seven bowls came and talked with me, saying to me, “Come, I will show you the judgment of the great harlot who sits on many waters, 2“with whom the kings of the earth committed fornication, and the inhabitants of the earth were made drunk with the wine of her fornication.” 3So he carried me away in the Spirit into the wilderness. And I saw a woman sitting on a scarlet beast which was full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns. 4The woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet, and adorned with gold and precious stones and pearls, having in her hand a golden cup full of abominations and the filthiness of her fornication. 5And on her forehead a name was written:
MYSTERY, BABYLON THE GREAT, THE MOTHER OF HARLOTS AND OF THE ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH.
6 I saw the woman, drunk with the blood of the saints and with the blood of the martyrs of Jesus. And when I saw her, I marveled with great amazement
7But the angel said to me, “Why did you marvel? I will tell you the mystery of the woman and of the beast that carries her, which has the seven heads and the ten horns. 8“The beast that you saw was, and is not, and will ascend out of the bottomless pit and go to perdition. And those who dwell on the earth will marvel, whose names are not written in the Book of Life from the foundation of the world, when they see the beast that was, and is not, and yet is.
9“Here is the mind which has wisdom: The seven heads are seven mountains on which the woman sits. 18“And the woman whom you saw is that great city which reigns over the kings of the earth.”

Chapter 18: ALL THINGS WORK FOR GOOD

Vengeance is Mine, I will repay!

When I moved to Georgia back in 1969, I started out working at the Electrolux Treasury office in Atlanta Georgia. After working there for a couple of years I heard about a job in a one-girl office for CP&W  Printing Co.  It was more pay and also I would get paid once a week instead of bimonthly, which sometimes was a struggle financially.  CP&W Co. printed cartons, packaging and labels for companies such as Coca-Cola, Pepsi etc. I had to self- train, as the girl that previously held the position left for her new job and could not stay to train me. I used to go through the files to research how things were handled previously to learn how to do them.

It was a small branch of the company that had about 10 to 12 employees who were all men, so I was the only female in office. This was often difficult because these men would be very flirty and quite forward towards me, especially while the bosses were gone.  Also the bosses themselves, which consisted of Don Holland, an assistant who was the salesman, use to be flirty also.  They use to try and get me to be the date of one of their potential clients, but I always refused.  I was a Christian with very strong morals and had not dated much really, as I was waiting for my “Mr. Right” who I had been praying for since I was five years old.  (See chapter 7: “Sharron’s Mr. Right”.)  

The branch manager, Mr. Holland, decided I needed someone to protect me, so he decided he was going to be my “godfather” from here on out.  I did not mind as my father was a long distance independent truck driver who lived in Tampa, Florida so I never saw him.  It was nice having someone looking out for me.

One of the main employees: “Richard” (who was married) was their technical man, and this company depended upon his color match skills - he was their main asset.  But, he also thought he was Elvis or God’s gift to women!  He would strut himself around me as if I was suppose to melt at his feet and do his bidding.  I was not the least bit impressed by him so I usually ignored him.  He was their ink expert, so without his expertise, they would all be out of a job.  He use to match the ink on packages and make it for less to get the job of printing their materials.  He was the company’s bread and butter so they all treated him like royalty. 

One day while preparing our weekly petty cash disbursements for our home office, I decided to be very bold and placed a little Bible tract in the envelope which was one of those tracts that looked like a small comic book entitled: “This Was Your Life”.  I knew there could be repercussions over sending it but decided to take a step of faith and do it anyway.   It was about two weeks later that the three owners whose initials were: “CP&W”, in our company name, came to visit us.  I was sitting at my desk when the president came and sat on the corner of my desk and began to question me.  He asked me if I was a person of faith and began “interrogating” me at first but then began to laugh and told me he was just messing with me but could not keep it up, but that I made his day when that tract was shown to him!  He said his office manager opened the petty cash request envelope and the tract fell out and she brought it to him and said: “this will make your day!”. It seems he was a strong believer and had been praying for Don Holland and the others for years and felt God sent me as a witness.

 

I worked at this job for about six months and one day my manager called me in his office and told me he really liked the way I self trained and learned everything on my own and that he was very pleased with me, so to keep up the good work.  Well, everything seemed to be going great and I loved my new job, until one day when the two bosses were gone, I had an unpleasant encounter with our tech (Richard, aka Elvis).  I stepped into the lab to give him an ink formula I had just finished working up when he grabbed me in front of one of the plant machine operators and tried to kiss me!  I shoved him off and told him to stop and ran from his lab very upset.  He was laughing at me to the other guy, and said, “Awe, you need to let go and relax as you might really enjoy it! “.

A week passed and things seemed back to normal, when Richard asked Don, the manager, upon his return from his trip, if he could talk with him about something.  They closed the door and I thought very little about it until later on, Don asked me if I could hang around a few minutes after work as he wanted to talk with me.   We sat in his car and he told me he was going to have to let me go, that there was some problems with my work and they were going to hire someone from another company in my place.  I cried and so did he!  He told me this was the hardest thing he has ever had to do as he felt I was like a daughter to him.   The next day he asked me if I would be willing to stay two weeks longer to train the new girl!  Normally most people would say “NO, that’s your problem!” but I was held to a higher standard.  The Lord spoke and very gently reminded me: “Do good to those that despitefully use you, love your enemies.” (Matthew 5:44); Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself (Matthew 22:39). 

I discovered later, while training my replacement, what really happened.  It seemed Richard did not like being rejected by me and gave Don an ultimatum:. "It’s her or me.". She said she knew him (Richard), as they use to work for the same company before coming to work for “CP&W”.  She asked me why I stayed the two weeks to train her after getting fired, as she would have told them where to go, and could not have done it.  I was able to share with her how I could do it and the principles I lived by and about the Lord I loved more.  Also that I knew he would lead me to another, better job so I was not the least bit worried.

I worked out my two weeks with no job leads, and was about to go apply for unemployment the next week, but decided to attend the evening service at “Welcome All Baptist Church” on a Sunday evening in which we had testimony time.  I felt inspired to share my ordeal with this body of believers and after the service one of our youth group friends came up to me and said he would talk to his employment manager, Laverne Mashburne, to find out whether there were any openings or not. The next day I received a call; it seemed they were hiring and as the Lord would have it, I got the job!  I had a week break then got hired by Cotton States Insurance Co. main office and never missed a pay check!  Also, this job lead me to my husband, Jack Wright which is in chapter 7: “Sharron’s Mr. Right” should you wish to read this incredible answer to prayer with such detail only our Heavenly Father could work out!

Just a bit of additional information, a year after I left the “CP&W Printing Co.” it burned to the ground and everyone lost their jobs!  It truly is "a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God' (Hebrews 10:31) and also “Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is Mine; I will repay saith the Lord' (Romans 12:19), and “But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons'. (Colossians 3:25)   Also, “All things work together for good to those that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose.'  (Romans 8:28)

What an awesome God we serve!  He is: El-Elyon, the Most High God, Who is the first cause of everything, the Possessor of the heavens and Earth. He is the Everlasting God, the Great God, the Living God, the merciful God, the faithful God, the Mighty God. He is Truth, Justice, Righteousness, and Perfection.  He is El- Elyon --- the Highest Sovereign of the heavens and the Earth.
ADONAI, my Lord and my Master. 

He is Jehovah --- the completely Self-Existing One, always present, revealed and Jesus, Who is the same yesterday, today, and forever.
JEHOVAH JIREH:  The one who meets all our needs and provides for them.
JEHOVAH SHAMMAH: the One who will never leave or forsakes me.  You are always there.  I take comfort and am encouraged and confidently and boldly say, The Lord is my Helper; I will not be seized with alarm --- I will not fear or dread or be terrified.  What can man do to me?

Chapter 4: 4th Encounter: Stop That Plane!

A PLANE TRIP TO BE REMEMBERED!
Background information:  I was one of eleven children, six sisters and five brothers, of which I happened to be second in the family lineup.  I moved away when I turned twenty-one, to Marietta, Georgia where I currently reside.  My parents were married for twenty-five years and sometime around age twenty-five, my mother filed for a divorce.  I seemed to be the only one in the family at that time that was a believer, so my mother sent for me to come down to be with her during that difficult time. The following account is my fourth and final angelic encounter (I think!).

Years ago, during a major family crisis, my mother phoned and asked me to fly down to Tampa-she needed my consoling. She had arranged a flight for me to Tampa on a short notice, and I was to pick up the ticket at the old Atlanta airport that night before my flight. My flight was scheduled to leave at 10:35 PM and since my church was having revival, I decided to attend the service that night to request prayer from my pastor and church, for wisdom to handle the needs of my family. At the end of the service, I went down and made my request to our pastor.  He then asked the church to remember Sharron in prayer this week regarding her family, and to please come forward to let her know by shaking her hand that you will be covering her in prayer. After practically everyone in the church came up in support, I left to catch my plane. It was now after 9 PM and I still had to go home first, to pick up my suitcase, then make it to the airport by the 10:35 PM departure, which included getting my ticket. 

 My roommates were going to drive me there –it was about 10 PM when we actually got underway.  All the way to the airport I prayed-pleaded, in the backseat telling the Lord, "You’re the Lord God Almighty, and you made the heavens and the earth – it's all under your control. Lord, you can put me on that plane!  Please Lord, hinder it from leaving.”  I reminded the Lord that I believed His Word, "And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son (John 14:13 KJV)" and “Therefore I say unto you, what things so ever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them” (Mark 11:24 KJV).  Also, I reminded the Lord that I was not late for a selfish reason – but because I had asked for prayer support for my family's needs, so somehow please hold up that plane for me.

It was 10:25 PM when we arrived at the Atlanta airport and my friends dropped me off in front of the airport terminal. I hurriedly made my way up to the Delta ticket agent (remember, I still had to pick up my ticket) and asked about the flight to Tampa. Up on the board I saw my Tampa flight flashing, "Departing". The ticket agent said, "I'll call them and see if I can get them to hold the flight till you get there - here is your ticket.” She couldn't get through to them on the phone for some reason, but she told me where to go and to run as fast as I could, and she would keep trying to call the agent and ask them to hold the flight – if she got through to them.

As it would happen, my plane was departing at the far end of the airport, so with suitcase in hand, I ran all the way there! Out of breath I almost collapsed at the ticket agent's desk, just as they were pulling down the name, “Tampa”. I asked one of the two agents "Is that plane still boarding?" He said, "No miss, that plane left ten minutes ago. I'm sorry; you'll have to catch another one". I dropped my suitcase in utter disappointment, and in total dismay, told the Lord, "I believed you and you let me down"! You said that whatever we asked for, if we believed and didn't doubt that we would have what we asked for. Well I believed you would put me on that plane – I didn't doubt, and you let me down! Just about this moment, I spotted a man in a brown suit just standing there with hands clasped, smiling at me – watching, and he approached me saying, "Miss, do you want on that plane?" I answered "yes!" He then said, "Well I'm going to put you on it!" I quickly looked behind him – he was standing in between me and the two ticket agents. I wanted to know what they thought about this man, saying he would put me on that plane, when they had just told me it was too late, the plane had already departed. But it seemed as if they could not even see me – they ignored us both! He reached down and took my suitcase and walked us out a side door in the terminal, which led out to the runway where my plane was departing. I recall thinking that this man must be a VIP for Delta airlines; I quickly followed him out the door, as he carried my suitcase for me. He asked me to stand there and wait, while he walked up to and spoke with one of the Delta employees with the headphones – one of the technicians. I was not aware of what was being said but I remember seeing the plane a good ways off, leaving of its own accord and suddenly stopping. Then I saw the plane entrance ramp descend, and the door opened.

The man in the brown suit guided me out to where the plane had stopped, took my suitcase and threw it up somewhere under the pilot’s cockpit, and guided me up the ramp to the plane. At the top of the stairs – in the doorway of the plane, where two stewardesses standing, watching and waiting for me to ascend the stairs to check my ticket, and I overheard one of them ask, "Who is she?" The other stewardess answered, "I don't know, I’ve never seen her before!" At this time a third stewardess appeared and stated, "Well don't look at me, neither have I".

As I began to climb the steps to the plane, I wanted to answer them, "I am a child of the King! My father put me on this plane!" As I walked down the aisle of the plane to my seat, I was aware of every eye upon me – wondering how I came to be on that plane! Well, it was an hour flight to Tampa and I was so elated with this experience – I had to tell someone, so I told the couple seated next to me about how I came to be on that flight – how God had intervened and answered my prayer. It wasn't until several weeks later that the Lord revealed to me who it was that had put me on that plane. All along I had believed it to be a Delta VIP, which had authority to put me on the plane – and that he just happened to be in the right place, at the right time, when I needed him most.

A few weeks later I was asked to share this experience with a large metro bible study group – approximately 400 people. I had never spoken before a group, especially one as large as this, so I began to pray that the Lord would take that experience and give me the words to say and the ability to say it exactly the way it happened – that He would speak through me. When I got to the part in my story regarding the man who I thought was a Delta VIP – the man in the brown suit, I heard myself saying, "I believe it was an angel", and then the Lord opened my eyes! As I said these words, I realized that that was the reason why the two ticket agents acted as though they didn't see us or care that we were walking out the door to board the plane. This was why the man had such authority and also why the plane technician submitted to his authority without question. That was also why a plane was stopped that by Delta Airline regulations was not supposed to be stopped and boarded, according to the ticket I had been holding.

I had stood upon God's promises "believe only and ye shall receive"! He came through for me – just like He promised in His Word and made the impossible possible.

Prayer of Faith, according to God's Word:

“Heavenly Father, you stated in your word: “Whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son (John 14:13 KJV)" and “Therefore I say unto you, what things so ever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them”(Mark 11:24 KJV). And again, it is written in Matthew 21:22 “And all things what so ever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive." So Heavenly Father, today I remind you of your Word, which I know that you watch over to perform, that based upon your written Word, and my confession of faith in Jesus Christ, my savior and Lord, Alpha and Omega, the “I Am”, the first and the last, the Beginning and the End, King of Kings, and Lord of Lords, I confess that you are the Lord, the God of all Flesh, and therefore nothing is impossible for you!  Make a way where there seems to be no way and intervene on my behalf in this, my petition, in Jesus name, Amen

Chapter 17: God's Signature

God is a Husband to the Widow

After my husband passed away July 2004, I had the opportunity to retire so after all I went through with my husband’s illness for fifteen years; I made my plans and set my goal for 2008.  My daughter, Rebecca – my third child, was attending Chattahoochee Technical Institute and was the only one living at home with me at the time.  I recall while driving to work one morning (I had a 1996 Ford Taurus, original owner) noticing that my car’s odometer was about to turn to all sevens.  It was somewhere around 76,896 and I said a simple little prayer in my heart to the Lord, something like:  “Lord, let me see or notice when my car’s odometer turns to all sevens, as that is your number.  Please let me notice it when it happens!” 

A few weeks later while I was eating lunch with Rebecca at McDonald’s in our car, I had completely forgotten this simple (non-life threatening) prayer request –but God had not!  I happened to see my odometer read: “77,777” and was so excited that the Lord remembered such a silly little thing for me, I just had to tell Him!  But the most exciting surprise He had for me was my car’s odometer died right there at: “77,777”! Each time I saw it I felt it was His signature that He was now “A husband to the widow and a father to the fatherless”.

Also, each time I had my car serviced or inspected for emissions sticker – tag renewal, the mechanics would comment about such a unique number for an odometer reading!  I had the joy of telling how the Lord’s signature was upon my car, taking care of us. 

I had the opportunity this year (2015) to donate my car, after 19 years of driving it (that’s great for a Ford!) to our church’s outreach pastor, who had it painted, fixed up (our Sunday School Class put new transmission in it) and was given to a little college girl.  This little story of God’s provision and answer to the simplest prayer was placed in the glove box, for her to realize and hopefully, remember and continue to share each time she notices the odometer’s “77,777”!                        

Chapter 6: The Golden Rule: Love thy neighbor as thyself

Love Your Enemies

The Golden Rule: Love others as yourself - this is what I grew up thinking about and using as a guideline - to treat others the way I wanted to be treated.  I did not know much about what the bible said, as during my childhood days, the King James was the only version available.  It was hard to understand but I understood the greatest commandment: Luke 10:27 And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbor as thyself".  

After I moved away from home to Marietta, Georgia (1969) my first job was with the Electrolux Treasury office in Atlanta, Georgia as a cashier in the accounts receivable department.  I was excited as this job paid twice what I had received while working for Honeywell in Tampa, Florida.  I had moved up here with a high school friend and her brother who was attending Kennesaw State University.  My friend got a job there also as secretary to one of the two VIP's in the company.  She was great at shorthand and an excellent secretary and we were temporarily living with her grandmother on her mother's side.  After about 6 months, I moved out with two girls from North Carolina and was completely on my own.

After about six months, I started attending a church: "Welcome All Baptist Church" and began hanging out with the young adult career group.  We started doing things together and hanging out after church, on weekends more and more and I began to withdraw from my friend as well.  At one point I heard a sermon on "Come out from among them and be separate" – I felt this is what the Lord wanted me to do, so I quit doing anything with my high school friend, Ellen.  She liked doing things that I was not comfortable being involved in - like parties where drinking and mingling were the main goal of the evening, which I realized I had little in common with.  I did not drink, nor mingle intimately like many of these party goers did and many times I was alone while everyone else got drunk and paired up.  They would be sick the next day (sometimes on the way home!) and sleep in, which to me made no sense!  Also, I did not like going to drive-in restaurants and meeting guys and "hooking up" with them, so I realized I had nothing in common with Ellen.  I was taught to pray and wait for "Mr. Right" (see "Sharron's Mr. Wright" for God's answer) so I was especially not interested in fighting off these party boys.  

There was another secretary, Sheila, that worked for the other top VIP for Electrolux and one day she asked me if she could ride to work with me as she did not drive yet - did not have a car.  I agreed as she lived five minutes from my apartment.  We agreed to leave by 7:30 AM to reach Atlanta, by 8:00.   My friend Ellen had gotten upset with me because I no longer wanted to go hang out with her and she began to turn against me.  Things began to happen one right after another, which really tested my faith and spiritual walk.  At this time I was not yet familiar with much in the Bible, except what I heard preached each Sunday, and what my grandmother had repeatedly told me growing up:  Luke 10:27 And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbor as thyself".  Also, "Love your enemies and do good to those that despitefully use you".  

One day while at work, I received a phone call from a company, "Lullaby Diaper Service" stating that they heard I was interested in their diaper service.  I was indignant at this as I had never even had a boyfriend and could not possibly be pregnant!   I informed the lady about this and asked how she came to get my name and work number.  She said, "Well you might ask someone named Mary, as that is the referral we received".  This was one of my two roommates and I knew she had nothing to do with this.  I asked her when she arrived home and she confirmed she knew nothing about it and was upset someone had used her name.  

The following week, one Friday night while I was waiting for Mary to return home - she was going out on a date she regretted and was planning on coming home early, when the phone rang.  It was supposedly someone from Tampa, Florida looking for Ellen - an old boyfriend who wanted to get in touch with her.  I informed him I had not seen her lately and knew nothing about her but gave her address and phone number to him.  A little later Mary returned home and we left for Shoney's restaurant for desert.  As I walked to my car I noticed that it was covered with what appeared to be a mixture of corn meal, eggs, and water, all lumpy and running down the roof of my car, all over it.  It was still sliding down so I knew it had just happened - the perpetrators of this crime were probably watching out there somewhere laughing!  It had slid down the front windshield into the wipers - it was a total mess!  I was shocked - so was Mary.  We got into the car, drove to the gas station next to our apartments, and a very sweet guy offered to rinse our car off for us - he informed us we needed to do it quickly as that stuff, if allowed to dry, would have ruined my paint and would never have come off!   We both had an idea who was behind this by now.   We figured it was Ellen and her friends and that was the reason for the old boyfriend call – to see if I was at home.  The next day when Sheila (who was participating in this stuff) arrived to ride in with me, my car had no sign of the mess and I never even mentioned that it had happened.  I just left her wondering, knowing she could not ask about it.  I never told anyone at work that it even happened.

After a couple of weeks had passed, one morning my rider - Sheila never showed up.  I waited till 8:00 AM for her but never heard from her.  I was actually late to work that day due to waiting for her.  Around 9:00 that morning she arrived looking very angry and approached my desk.  To help you get the picture, I worked in an open office where there were only partitions for each department - just like the movie with Dolly Pardon in "Nine to Five", and everyone knew each other's business!  It was one whole floor open with nothing but partitions separating each area, which you could easily see over while sitting at your desk. Anyway, back to my story - Sheila walked up to me and said very loudly and angrily, "Okay b****, why did you leave me!?  I was so upset and shaking with righteous indignation, as I had been late waiting on her!  I tried to maintain my composure and anger, and sternly replied: "Look, I was late waiting for you this morning.  You are not doing me any favors riding to work with me - I am doing you a favor.  If you want to ride to work with me, you be there by 7:30 as in the future I will be leaving at 7:30 whether or not you are there so if you are running late I have a phone, you can call me!  From now on if you are not there I am leaving as I am not going to be late because of you.”  She tried to get me to lower my voice as "everyone can hear you" but I finished my speech and sat down, shaking all over.  

Around two hours later, she walked up to me and speaking as if nothing had happened at all, asked: "Sharron, can you give me a ride home today as Ellen has to work her other job and I need a ride home, if you wouldn't mind".  I wanted to yell in her face and say, "Are you crazy - after what you just said and did?  No, get your own transportation from now on" but that still small voice reminded me of my rules to live by: “do good to those that despitefully use you, love your enemies, and treat others the way you want to be treated" so I reluctantly yielded and said sure.  While driving home she lit into me and started saying the most horrible things you can imagine!   She said, "Sharron, did you know that your mother does not even know who your daddy is?  Also, “the only reason you are still a virgin is because a guy would have to put a bag over your head to have relations with you!”  I cannot even recall all she said to me but she did not stop the railing accusations, speaking very angrily all the way home - I only recall the two mentioned above.  I held my tongue through most of it but did say: “you have no room to talk anyway as you are living with your boyfriend” to which she replied: “What we have is beautiful, but you are a tramp.”  I let her vent - I tried to turn my radio up loud so I could not hear her, but she reached over and turned it off, and said:  “Honey, it's a long way home and you’re going to have to sit here and listen!"  Normally you would just pull over, ask her to get out and find her own way home but I was guided by a higher power that held me to my "Golden Rule" and prompted me to leave her to Him - my enemies were His enemies, and vengeance was His, not mine.  Also, while driving home I had noticed that about 4 or 5 cars back Ellen was following us, and I knew then that they fully expected me to put her out and Ellen would pick her up, but I did not!  

After arriving at her apartment to drop her off, I said: "Sheila, one of these days I hope you grow up and act like an adult" to which she answered, "Yes mother!" and slammed the car door and departed.   Needless to say, she stopped riding in with me.  My friend Ellen moved back to Florida shortly after this incident and life went on. 

Around 6 months later, one day I decided to bake a lemon meringue pie which was my favorite and I loved to cook so I practiced on people at work.  The Lord spoke to me: "I want you to invite Sheila to share your pie".  I froze - and thought, Lord, please don't make me do that - besides, she may not even like lemon pie!  But again He asked me to go and ask her to join us when we eat the pie.  I was shaking so badly, especially my knees, that when I walked up to her desk, she looked at me with a cold stare that seemed to say, "And what do you want?"  My legs started banging on the back of her desk till I had to step back and I thought my heart would pound out my throat, but in obedience to the Lord, I asked: “Sheila, I made a lemon meringue pie and your welcome to come join us for a piece if you like."  She was shocked and smiled sweetly and said: “Well, thank you Sharron, I would love to, and as a matter of fact, that is my favorite pie!"  

A few months later, the head cashier was leaving to become a Catholic Nun and we were having a going away party for her.  I remember she came to me and said that Ellen and Sheila told her not to believe anything I said, that I exaggerated and made up stuff all the time - nothing I said was true.  She then said: “I have watched you and worked with you for a year now and none of that is true, those things really do happen to you and you do not exaggerate!  I just want to ask you one thing: who was your teacher?” 

Years down the road when I finally met my “Mr. Right” Ellen called me to congratulate me on my wedding day and told me she was happy for me and that if anyone deserved it, I did.  Several years later while I was on vacation in Florida at Crystal Springs with my family, Ellen was there and I got to speak with her and tell her how God had answered my prayers for my "Mr. Right".  I have the peace of God that He alone can give to those that love Him and walk in obedience and simple trust, according to His Word – it really does work and like His Word says:  "When a man's ways please the LORD, He maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him. Proverbs 16:7.  I am living proof that He is faithful to His Word and promises. 

  

Chapter 5: THE WORD OF OUR TESTIMONY [Updated today March 1, 2024]

Today, March 1, 2024 I had a vision/visitation from the Lord while in prayer this morning. It was raining outside and for the past 2 years I have done prayer walks throughout our neighborhood's 3 cul-de-sacs, but today I was only able to walk two and returned home to wait for the rain to let up. But according to weather reports that was not on the horizon.   The Lord said: You can just go into your space and pray.  So I did, and began coming into the Lord's presence, quiet before him, examining my heart, asking for the Holy Spirit to help me pray as I was heavily burdened for my daughter and what I was hearing outside my room. I felt overwhelmed and helpless to make these demonic attacks stop and cried out to the Lord for help on how to deal with this to set her free.  I began praying in the Spirit as I had no words to express my feelings, when I began to cry so broken hearted before him, till the tears began to cease.  I then experienced a visitation from the Lord himself in, I guess, a vision (?).  The Lord appeared  [this images is exactly how he appeared to me in this vision!] and he came up to me and gently took my teary face in his loving hands and said: "I am still here to wipe those tears from your eyes as I did when you were five, as I have never left you.  I am still here beside you, as this battle is not yours but mine, as you are mine and all your battles are mine."

You can read this experience below. [The image I drew from my memory of what Jesus looked like from a five year old's memory drawn 30 yrs ago]

A Heart for God

 

I wanted to share my personal testimony, with the hope that there are others like myself that are searching for answers also.

I came from a Seventh Day Adventist background.  My mother’s people were Seventh Day Adventist, and so were my dad’s.   I was taught at a very young age that the Adventists were the only “latter-day-church”.  I was also told that I must ask Jesus into my heart, and keep the Ten Commandments, that Jesus died for “past” sins and I had to keep the commandments to keep my salvation – I must work for it. I recall feelings of hopelessness at “being good enough” as it seemed I constantly broke commandments especially considering I was one of eleven children and I was the only one that seemed concerned about it. 

One of the commandments that I had the hardest time with was number four: “Honor the Sabbath day and keep it holy” as my family did not attend church unless I asked to go, then a few family members would accompany me.  You were not supposed to do any work on Saturday (Sabbath Day) or watch television – that is what would always get me!  All the good stuff came on television; it seemed to me, on Saturday, especially the mornings: cartoons!  Also every Saturday afternoon “Science Fiction Theater” came on and I loved science fiction movies.  Temptations were everywhere and I always had to ask for forgiveness and felt like a failure.  I use to pray to Jesus and ask him: “why do you even let me keep living as I can’t seem to ever go through a Saturday without sinning.”

I had a heart for the Lord at a very early age: the age of five.  I began “talking” to this personal invisible “friend” I had come to discover – Jesus.  I use to pray to him about everything when I was little.  I use to climb into our closet and during family crisis or a time of need I would converse with him as my grandmother had taught me to do.  Also my older sister, Betty, taught me to say my prayers before going to bed each night; I always prayed: “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep.  If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. Forgive me for my sins today (I named them as they came to mind) watch over mommy, daddy, Betty, and help me be good tomorrow, in Jesus name, Amen.” 

Summers were spent with our Grandma Mascunana, on my mother's side who use to tell us bible stories, as she had no TV.  She was a teacher and very knowledgeable regarding the Bible and use to tell us constantly that Jesus was returning very soon and we should get ready. I use to ask her: "Grandma, if I start being good right now will I get to go to Heaven when Jesus comes?"  She would tell me that very soon the book of Life would be closed and no one else could be written in it - you would be either saved or lost.  Also she stated believers would have to go through the terrible 7-year tribulation period that Revelation spoke about and that God would seal all that belonged to Him and protect them.  

One summer while staying with my grandmother (on my mother’s side) I became very ill.  My brothers and sisters use to run up and down the stairs to my grandmother’s apartment chasing each other, but I wasn't feeling very well, so I let my grandmother know.  I became so sick that I can remember not being able to respond to her voice and questions about what was wrong.  I could hear her voice but I felt like I didn’t have enough energy in my body to respond to her.  I remember just staring up at her face while she wiped my face and body with a cool wash cloth – I had a very high fever.  I remember feeling like each breath would be my last, as if I had no more energy to breathe another time. 

My grandmother use to keep us during the summers while my mother and father drove tractor-trailers long distance from Tampa, Florida to New York.  This was around 1953 so there were no cell phones or any way to contact my parents to let them know how sick I was.  She did not want to take me to the doctor or hospital without my parents’ permission nor did she have the funds to do so.  She tried waiting but my fever got so high and my breathing very labored.  She finally got scared and took me to the hospital where the doctor informed her: “Mrs. Mascunana, you have a very sick little girl and if you had waited until the morning she would not have made it through the night”.  The doctor said: “even now we are not sure we can save her as she has a very serious bladder infection.”  They placed me under intensive care for ten days in a room with a lady that was 100 years old, who was close to death also.  A nurse sat with us for the first part of that time until the fever broke.  I do remember being placed into whirlpool tubs to bring my fever down and having chills where they would cover me with warm blankets. 

During this time I had an experience with the Lord Jesus Christ that was to change me for the rest of my life.  I do not know if what I experienced was a dream or whether I was actually so close to death that my spirit was leaving my body, I only know that I saw the Lord.  I was somewhere above the earth in a cloud with Jesus.  I was dressed in a little white robe and Jesus had his arm around me; I was crying as if my heart was broken and He said, “Little one, why weepiest thou?  Where I am going to take you, you will never be sick or hurt again.  You will never remember the things that have hurt you and caused you pain.  Where I am taking you, you will only remember happy things, and you will never be sick again, so why are you weeping?”  Somehow I knew I was dying, even as a child.  He placed his hands on each side of my face and with his thumbs, wiped the tears from my face, but I began to cry even harder.  I said: “but I do remember and I am unhappy because I want my mother to be there too.  Please let me go back and tell her about you and heaven so she will be there too.”  Suddenly I seemed to be descending down to earth, through the roof of our house – in the kitchen, where my mother was cooking.  I remember running up to her, pulling on her clothes, trying desperately to describe what I had just seen, but she told me to go outside and play as she was very busy and did not have time.  I remember feeling sad – it was like the Lord wanted to show me what I was going to be up against.

During this same ten day time period, I had another dream or vision.  I dreamed that my mother and I were walking down what seemed to be a road filled with the cares of this life – scenes like store windows showing: school rooms, parks with kids playing, grocery stores, etc. when I saw this stairway leading up to heaven along the way; it looked like golden transparent glass.  On either side, every so many steps were these beautiful happy beings in white apparel and they were smiling at us and with their facial expressions and hands were gesturing for us to come up – it seemed to me we were welcome to climb those stairs!  I could see a strange light at the top of the stairs – it reminded me of a sunbeam coming through a window with dust particles floating around in it, only this was a very bright light with sparkling dust floating within the beam of light.  There seemed to be a beautiful park at the top, which intrigued me – I grabbed my mother’s hand and said, “Let’s go up there” and I tried pulling her up with me but she resisted and said: “I can’t go, you’ll have to go by yourself”, and she pulled away.  I grabbed her hand again and pulled her back towards the stairs but again she said, “No Sharron, I can’t go”.  I ran up to her again pleading with her: Mommy, look: they want us to come – it would make them happy if we went up there!”  But again, she answered: “Sharron, I cannot go with you, you are going to have to go alone – I cannot go with you.”

When I was about 14 years of age, I found out what the Lord was trying to tell me through this dream-vision.  He was saying: Sharron, you must make up your mind about me – you must choose between me and your mother.”  Well, I chose Him and decided to seek His help in bringing my mother with me.  While at a crusade at age 14, the minister said: “You know Jesus said, if you are ashamed to confess me before men, I’ll be ashamed to confess you before my father in heaven and his holy angels, but if you confess me before men then I too will confess you before my father in heaven and all his holy angels.  I was one of eleven children – second to the oldest and had all of our family with me at this crusade, but I heard the Lord ask me: “Sharron, if you really love me, I want you to go down there”.  I knew I loved him but did not want to go alone so I tried to get someone to go with me – I was afraid I would get left or separated from my family, but no one volunteered to go with me.  My heart was pounding through my chest – I knew I had to go and show the Lord that I loved him but was torn over going alone when my mother said:  “Sharron, if you want to go down there, go ahead, we will wait for you”.  I got up to go and after descending a few steps, my grandmother (my father’s mother) stood and said she would go with me.  She told me she wanted to make sure I was willing to go alone first.  I got baptized into the Seventh Day Adventist church the following Saturday. 

After this I tried keeping the Ten Commandments, confessing each night before I went to sleep, any sins I had committed.  I would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and either remember some sin I forgot to include or fell asleep without saying my childhood prayer!  I lived in fear of forgetting to confess something and on judgment day finding out I did not qualify for heaven – it was tormenting!  Sometimes I’d be so unhappy that I use to ask God to let me die.  I thought: what was the use in living because, no matter how hard I tried or how bad I wanted to, I just could not live a day without sinning!  I was just no good – a waste of God’s time; I was so unhappy over this failure to measure up to God’s standards!  After I had been baptized I remember my dad saying, “Ah, you are going to hell just like the rest of us – you aren’t any better then the rest of us.  I made up my mind right then and there that if God had made a way to get to heaven then I would find it!  I would show my dad that I did not have to go to hell – if God had made a way to get to Heaven, then I wanted God to show it to me!

When I was 21 years old, the Lord ordered my steps to Georgia.  He also put me with a Baptist believer that invited me to her church.  I remember thinking I could not attend her church as she was of the “mark of the beast” cause she worshiped on Sunday.  I thought it was of the devil – like devil worship but wanted to attend one of her services to see what it was like – to compare it to ours.  I asked the Lord to please protect me while I was in their service from the “mark of the beast” and the Antichrist.  I went with her and was totally surprised to find out that the Lord’s presence was there!  I knew he was there and I had not even felt his presence like that in my own Adventist church, ever!  I would just feel good because I had obeyed the 4^th commandment each time I attended church.  I became so confused that I ran home and as was my custom, I ran into the presence of the Lord – to His throne of Grace.  I had come to the conclusion that Jesus was the place to seek the answers.  I asked him to please let me know where he wanted me to worship – the Adventist or the Baptist – which one are you in - which one is truth?  I laid all before the Lord – every belief that I had at that moment.  I said: “Lord, which church do you want me to attend?”  I totally threw away all my beliefs and started with Jesus and came to the conclusion that I could trust Him and Him alone and not “men”.  I knew He would lead me the right way.  I felt like I’d start over – with just the Bible and Jesus.  I threw away everything else I had been taught.  I started step by step, in simple trust and faith in Jesus alone, knowing that He would not lead me in the wrong direction.

The first time I attended the Baptist church service I recall the pastor’s sermon – it was about coming out from among them and separating ourselves from some of our friends that are not living for the Lord.  I was hanging out with people that did not believe or live for the Lord so I had to find new friends, which I did at this little Baptist church.  I remember when the pastor gave the invitation that first Sunday, I did not even wait for the song to finish – I almost ran down the isle, thinking I had to be saved all over again.  When I got down there and the pastor’s wife explained that “for by grace are ye saved through faith: and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, lest any man should boast. (Ephesians 2:8,9)  She explained that all I had to do to receive eternal life was ask Jesus into my heart and accept him as my personal savior.  I remember thinking, you mean I had “eternal life” all this time and I didn’t even know it?  All these years – since age 14, that I had done everything that needed to be done to “get to heaven?” I couldn’t believe it was so easy and wonderful!  He, who the Son sets free, is free indeed!  I had been set free – for the first time in my Christian life I was at peace with God and free indeed!

I hope my testimony helps you realize that Jesus is “the Way, The Truth and the Life, no man comes to the Father except through Jesus. 

If you would like to guarantee that your name is written in the Lamb’s book of life and that He will confess you before His Father and all the Holy angels, please pray this simple prayer and only believe, to receive Jesus as Savior and Lord:

Father, it is written in Your Word that if I confess with my mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in my heart that you have raised him from the dead, I shall be saved.  Therefore, Father, I confess that Jesus is my Lord.  I make Him Lord of my life right now.  I believe in my heart that You raised Jesus from the dead.  I renounce my past life with Satan and close the door to any of his devices. 

I thank you for forgiving me of all my sin.  Jesus is my Lord, and I am a new creation.  Old things have passed away; now all things become new in Jesus’ name.  Amen. 

Scripture References:

John 3:16                                                      John 14:6

John 6:37                                                      Romans 10:9, 10

John 10:10                                                    Romans 10:13

Romans 3:23                                                Ephesians 2:1-10

2 Corinthians 5:19                                        2 Corinthians 5:17

John 16:8, 9                                                  John 1:12

Romans 5:8                                                  2 Corinthians 5:21

Chapter 12: OUR LOVE'S TRIALS, PART 4

The Journey Home – Heaven’s Gates Open Wide

After Jack’s last attempt to take his life, he realized that this was not acceptable to the Lord and relinquished himself to the Lord’s will.  He began to seek the Lord, through prayer and watched a lot of choice TV Evangelists.  I know a few of them:  Dr. David Jeremiah, Joyce Myer (he really loved Joyce Myer) and Shepherd’s Chapel (only because they actually read chapter and verse on TV).  I was trying to work as long as I could as I figured at some point down the road I would have to take off to be home with Jack.  I tried to save up all my sick leave and vacation in anticipation of the time when he would need me to be there.  I use to pray that the Lord would number his days and that when the time came for the Lord to take Jack home to be with Him – it would have His signature on it, and would speak of Him.  My youngest daughter Rebecca was 18-19 years old at this time and delayed entering college so she could be home with her daddy, watching out for him during the day while I worked.  Even though I was greatly concerned over how I was going to financially handle the cut in pay while on sick leave, I still trusted the Lord’s timing in all this.  (Note: I ended up only using 17 sick-leave days the whole course of his 15-year bout with cancer: I reached the limits of accumulative sick leave, so Cobb County School District added 1 year to my retirement totals when I finally retired –people, that’s God!) 

Around a year before Jack passed away, he started having problems again – nothing major but he knew something was not right as he had begun to lose his ability to walk.  He had become, what he called: “A wall-walker”, as he would have to hold onto the wall as he went back and forth to the rest room or outside to sit and smoke, and get some much needed fresh air.  We checked into getting him a motorized wheel chair or scooter but our downstairs, where he stayed would not accommodate either. We found these wireless remote doorbells and placed one upstairs and one downstairs so if Jack needed us he could ring the doorbell and we would check on him.  I did a lot of sewing – making quilts, and was downstairs most of the time in my sewing room; to be near him should he need me.  Many times he would fall down and it was nearly impossible for us to get him back up on his feet. 

One day something happened that totally scared Jack, enough that he had to call an ambulance to take him to Emory University Hospital for Dr. Olson to investigate.  While we waited for the results of his CT scan and MRI, a doctor that had never seen Jack, checked his films to see what was going on – to compare them to his last one.  He finally filled us in on Jack’s latest prognosis – it wasn’t good! 

We were told that the cancer had changed and had upgraded to a Glioblastoma Multiform and appeared to be everywhere now.  He was immediately placed on Hospice care and basically sent home to let it run its course.  I checked on-line for information regarding his prognosis and how it was different now compared to his previous “Glioma Astropsytoma”;  putting it into layman’s terms – it basically meant: Stage 4 cancer, all shapes and sizes, blasted everywhere in his brain” – it was like a shotgun blasted cancer cells everywhere, in every size!     The MRI “slices” revealed live cancer in all areas of Jack’s brain; still he had none of the systems Dr. Olson told us to watch out for!  Only God can claim responsibility for that! 

 I remember I had just been moved to the main office for Cobb County School District, as we had a new supervisor, in the Textbook Warehouse – but it was much closer to our house, should Jack need me.    I was concerned over how our new supervisor would feel, should I need to suddenly leave to be with Jack, but she totally understood: “whatever you need to do Sharron, its okay with me.”    

I remember about three months prior to Jack’s death having “dark cloud” feelings and writing my pastor about it and asking for prayer.  One of the warehouse supervisors, “Curtis” was a believer and one morning I arrived at work, when this feeling of dread fell upon me very strongly, so I asked him if he had ever had what I called “dark cloud” feelings before?  Most people could not relate when I tried to describe these to them but something usually always happened when I had them this strong.  Curtis answered: “Yes, Sharron I know exactly what you are talking about – as a matter of fact, I too have been having them for the past few weeks, and have felt they were for you; I am praying for you and your family though”.   

Rebecca phoned one day to tell me her daddy was acting very strange: he seemed unusually confused; it was freaking her out.  She asked: “could you please come home and check on him?”  I left work and half way home a premonition took hold of me so strong that I just started crying bitterly before the Lord – driving through a flood of tears!  I thought I was going to have to pull over, it hit me so hard.  I felt like Jack had died – it was as if the Lord let me feel right then, every emotion and feeling of loss I would experience somewhere in the near future.  I pleaded with the Lord to give me strength to be able to withstand the grief and sorrow, when the time came, for me and my girls to lose Jack.  I really felt as if Jack had died but knew he had not!  I wanted also, to stop crying before I got home and confronted Jack and Rebecca.  I did not want them to know I was crying so bitterly – Jack needed me to be strong, so did my girls.  I now feel that the Lord let me experience all the grief I would encounter at that moment, and then He totally replaced it with His peace, strength and joy, that pass all understanding, which I still have to this day! 

When I got home Jack seemed very confused – I was not sure what was taking place.  He pointed to the floor and said:  “Momma, you need to do something about all those cave crickets over there – see them?  They are all along the walls – you need to call an exterminator.”  I looked all along the baseboards but did not see even one cricket, much less the numbers Jack spoke of seeing.  I called his hospice nurse and they came to check him out.  When I explained to the nurse what Jack had seen, that was not really there, she told me:  “To him those crickets are really there – he can see them; it could be a side effect of the Morphine he is on – just go kill them or spray them, go along with whatever he says he sees, as you will never convince him they are not there.”   

The doctor prescribed one Morphine pill a day for Jack, just to be safe, and we had a bottle of liquid Morphine in our refrigerator, for future use should the time come that he would need it.  He took a few other prescriptions but nothing significant.  All things considered Jack had none of the symptoms the doctors had prepared him for!  When the Hospice nurse came to check on him several times a week, they would ask: “Jack, any headaches? (No), seizures? (No) problems sleeping? (No), anything going on we need to know about? (No)  He would say:  “I just wish I could get up and walk outside once in a while, I would love it if you could make that happen”. 

I will never forget when the Lord gave me an “attitude adjustment”.  After a particularly hard week end, I was feeling sorry for myself regarding all I had to deal with (like taking care of the personal, private needs that a bed ridden person has – you take for granted while you are able to do them for yourselves!) and I was thinking how the Lord was using all this to change Jack and his spiritual attitudes and this is what I received from the Lord: (I felt like one of the seven churches in Revelation: “Nevertheless, these things I have against you”…) “Sharron, this is not just about Jack and his attitudes and what I am doing in his life – you have some attitudes that need working on yourself! It is how you deal with these things – your attitude in dealing with what Jack is going through that I am going to hold you accountable for!  Remember to ‘bring honor and glory to my name!”  I noticed I had become cynical and perhaps a little critical regarding all I had been going through.  But the Lord reminded me – after I had been complaining (to myself) over climbing the stairs about four times in five minutes: “You think you have it tough – what about Jack?  He is only able to sit on the corner of the bed all day – at least you can walk and do whatever you desire – he cannot!”  Do you know how much Jack would love to be able to go up and down these stairs that you are complaining about?  I hung my head in shame – I became aware that the Lord was also trying to change my own attitudes.  I had been feeling sorry for myself over having to be responsible for Jack’s duties along with my own; also not being able to attend church like I use to.  I came to realize, “this too shall pass” – this is just a season in my life: I must be careful how I respond to Jack’s trials and needs; I must do it as unto the Lord. 

One particular Christian nurse, Zoe, loved Jack and use to tell him:  “Jack, considering all you’ve been through, I’ve never known a person with such a sweet, wonderful attitude as you have.  You are a pleasure to attend to – one day when we all get to Heaven, you are going to have such a large crowd around you and I’m going to be standing in that crowd yelling: Hey Jack, remember me?  I use to be your nurse!  He would laugh and say:  “Zoe, Zoe, Zoe!”   All the Hospice personnel assigned to him kept telling him what a wonderful man he was.  They told him he was a joy to be around – an inspiration, and that he had the most wonderful attitude considering what he’s had to deal with.  This really blessed Jack and made him “blossom.”  I guess he never thought of himself as a blessing, inspiring other people’s lives – this seemed to open his spiritual eyes a lot.  

The last four months of Jack’s life, he was spiritually ready for the Lord.  He was truly “at peace” in his heart and spirit.  He was looking forward to his new life in heaven – forever.  He came to realize that he was doing something for the Lord while going through his trials; by the way he was handling and responding to his situation.  He realized that God was getting glory by the way he was going through what he had been dealt.   

The last few weeks before Jack died, my supervisor allowed me to work from home to be with Jack.  Our computer office was right off our bedroom and I would work there, where I could check on him easily.  One evening I was searching through the bookshelf for a computer book, when I came across a little praise song book.  I began to flip through it and came to a song, “It Is Well with My Soul”.  I use to sing in a choir at Gold Kist and my church, so decided to see if I still remembered it, and when I got to the second stanza the Lord spoke:  “Jack is listening to you sing, it is really ministering to him – it comforts his soul – sing it for him”.  I began to sing with all my heart as if I were the only one in the house, knowing he was listening, even though I only sang with choirs, never solo, but this was different – it was for him; I sang the whole song.  Even though we never spoke about it, I knew it had ministered to Jack’s spirit and all was well with his soul!  Here are the lyrics:

It Is Well With My Soul
1. When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, 
when sorrows like sea billows roll; 
whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, 
It is well; it is well with my soul. 
Refrain: 
It is well with my soul, 
it is well, it is well with my soul. 

2. Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, 
let this blest assurance control, 
that Christ has regarded my helpless estate, 
and hath shed his own blood for my soul. 
(Refrain) 

3. My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought! 
My sin, not in part but the whole, 
is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, 
praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul! 
(Refrain) 

4. And, Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight, 
the clouds be rolled back as a scroll; 
the trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, 
even so, it is well with my soul. 
(Refrain) 

On the night before Jack passed away, I was working downstairs in my computer room when he called for me – he had fallen off the bed.  I got one of my daughter’s guy friends to help me lift him back on the bed, when he asked: “Hey momma, how about a cup of that wonderful coffee you make.”  I had been concerned because he had not slept at all in the past 24 hours but he refused to sleep.  Next he decided he wanted something to eat.  I prepared him some soup, of his choice but noticed when he spoke that his voice sounded raspy.  It sounded like he was beginning to lose his voice, it was much lower.  I asked: “what’s wrong with your voice – why are you talking like that?”  He answered; “Like what, this is the only way I can talk”.  Also, I noticed one of his legs was swollen – twice the size of the other one, and looked sunburned.  It had slid off the bed and I tried to lift it back and he screamed – just touching it was agonizing to him.  I knew something was happening but did not know what.  The final clue that his system was shutting down was when I checked his catheter-bag which was empty so I knew his kidneys were also shutting down!  I quickly called Hospice to see what I should do!  Our nurse instructed me to get the little bottle of Morphine in your refrigerator we gave you for this purpose.  It will help him breath – put a drop under his tongue, as often as he needs it; check with me as often as you need to – it sounds like his system is shutting down, it may be his time.   

I sat down next to him and I remember he grabbed my hand and held it tight – clinging to me as if for dear life.  I picked up a book entitled: “Heaven: Close Encounters of the God Kind” by Jesse Duplantis and started reading it to him.  After a couple of hours of him clinging to me – not wanting me to let go, he suddenly seemed unable to breath.  It was like the wind got knocked out of him and his face was full of panic.  I placed my hands upon his chest and yelled: “In the name of Jesus let him alone!”  He started breathing again and I quickly phoned our nurse.  She told me to keep giving him the Morphine drops, as in addition to being a pain reliever, it would open up his airways and help him breath.  I went through this for hours, until around 4:00 AM; he seemed to be at rest – sleeping so I decided I would try and get a little sleep myself.  We had placed a twin mattress on the floor beside the bed to soften his falls – he would try not to awaken me when he needed something, but in doing so would slide off the bed onto the floor.  I committed Jack to the Lord’s care, asked Him not to let anything happen while I slept and to awaken me if something should happen.   

Around 7:30 AM I suddenly woke up; I could not believe I had slept for over 4 hours – was he still alive, I wondered?  I saw that he was, but he was breathing funny – very noisy.  I called our Hospice nurse who was on her way, not far from us – she stated she would be there shortly.  She arrived and mentioned: “You know we could take your husband to the hospital and offer him some relief but he was very specific about letting things run their course and wanted to be at home when his time came – I believe he is going through congestive heart failure.”  

 I did not want to go against Jack’s wishes so I committed it to the Lord’s timing and called my church for prayer.  They sent one of our churches’ deacons – Larry Canady to our house to pray with us.  Larry arrived and asked: “What can I do for you Sharron, anything?”  We walked over to Jack and I asked him to lay hands on him and pray for his breathing.  He began to pray: “Lord, help this man – relieve his suffering; he has been through so much with this sickness, and his family has suffered along with him.  His heart is right before you – just let the man go, he has suffered enough Lord, please – let him go on to be with you, in Jesus Name, Amen.”  As soon as Larry finished praying, Jack relaxed and the noisy breathing stopped!  We looked at each other and said: “Wow, did that work or what!”  My girls would not come down as it frightened them to see and hear their daddy like that.  But just about this time Christina and Rebecca came down the stairs to bring me coffee, when the nurse said:  “Your husband just made eye contact with me, if you want to say something to him, now would be the time – you won’t have long so you need to do it quickly, he can hear you and understand.”  

I went first and told Jack: :Everyone always tells me what faith I have and how strong I am but it was because I was married to you that I am who I am – you are everything I asked the Lord for – you are my “Mr. Wright”.  Everything that I am today is because I was married to you.”   Next Christina went:  She told her daddy that he had taught them to be family and love each other – “family is all you’ve got so you love and take care of each other: you taught us that daddy.”  Rebecca told her daddy that he was a good daddy and she loved him.  Elena was still upstairs so we had her come down; she spoke last (it was like Jack was waiting for his last daughter) saying that her daddy was a good and loving father to them all and she loved him.  Finally, I thought I would say a prayer on Jack’s behalf, as if I was praying his final words before he departed: “Father into thy hands I commend myself, please forgive me for my indiscretions, cleanse me and forgive me of any wrong I’ve done, in Jesus Name.”  Jack looked at me and made eye contact and said: “I love you” and closed his eyes.  I thought he was going to sleep but the nurse said (the moment Jack closed his eyes): “he’s passed.”  I did not believe it so I reached up and touched his face – I said, “I think he is just sleeping.”  She answered, “No, he has passed but I can double check for you if you want me to confirm it.”  He had passed the moment he uttered his last words: “I love you!”  It definitely had God’s signature and timing all over it! 

Elena and a friend of hers did not want to be down there when they announced he had passed so they started back up the stairs.  Before she ascended, while at the bottom of our stairway, she said:  “Momma, daddy’s doorbell is ringing.”  I asked if it could be our house front doorbell, but she said, “No, it’s daddy’s doorbell – it’s ringing.”  I had one doorbell unit upstairs in the living room and the other in my sewing room, downstairs but both switches that controlled the doorbell unit (made them ring) were on Jack’s night stand.  He had both switches there; usually one was inside the drawer as a backup, the other on top somewhere.  Jack was in a hospital bed on one side of the room and we had stuff (twin mattress, chair, portable toilet, etc.) between his bed and the night stand.  I had been reading Jesse’s book about Heaven to him, but it was on the night stand – no one was anywhere near that night stand.  We were all around Jack’s bed but it was still ringing!  I went to locate the two switches and found one lying near his lamp.  Rebecca said, “Well that’s really creepy because his other switch is right there and is still ringing!”  I went to find out how this was possible – what was causing it to continue ringing?   I moved my Heaven book but there was nothing touching that other switch Rebecca had seen!  The timing of that doorbell ringing when no one went anywhere near that night stand to trigger it’s ringing, the moment the nurse pronounced him officially dead, was – to us, a God moment!  We all felt like Jack had made it to the gates of Heaven and wanted his family to know – “I’m here, you need to let them know I made it!” when his guardian angel said: “I can take care of that for you Jack” and an angel – for the last time, pressed that doorbell as Jack was escorted through the gates of Heaven!  Even if the nurse somehow had pressed it, it usually stopped the moment you took your finger off the switch – it did not continue to ring with no one touching it.  Jack’s switch kept ringing for a few minutes till we located both switches.  Everyone in that room felt the Lord’s presence that day and an anointing – as Jack bowed in the presence of his King, he was finally free and home!  Larry said: “Wow that was incredible – I’ve never experienced anything like that in my life, the Lord was truly in this place!” 

One more thing that the Lord did, I believe as a confirmation for me personally.  When I went to make Jack’s final arrangements, one of our deacons, Paul Chastain offered his assistance with setting things up for the service.  I had made Jack’s funeral arrangements 12 years prior, reluctantly but in the end was glad I had done it.  Our music director was going to play and sing a couple of songs that Jack liked.  One song Jack really loved, which was his favorite was: “Amazing Grace” so I arranged to have that sang and one other (I cannot recall at this time) but I was instructed to choose two songs.  If I could have chosen one more (I told Paul Chastain) I would have chosen, “All Is Well with My Soul” as the Lord had me sing that to Jack two weeks before he died.  When the service started, they started out playing “All Is Well with My Soul”!  I could not stop the tears of joy, as Paul had so lovingly added an extra song and had them sing it, I felt, to me!  I felt it was the Lord’s hand behind this and it told me that “All was well with Jack’s soul”

We had fought the fight, kept the faith and now there is laid up for me a crown of rejoicing unto all that look and love His appearing – Jack is my crown of rejoicing, and I get to spend all of eternity with him in the Father’s house with the King of Kings forever!